Seasons come and seasons go. Autumn is that season when most of what we know to be beautiful and vibrant slowly loses life and dies. Our once green trees and colorful flowers lose their luster and eventually fall to the ground…either gone forever or lying dormant for the winter. Some very quickly and some taking longer. No two seasonal changes are exactly the same… each happening at just the perfect moment.
There comes a moment in time when it is our final season. We won’t go into hiding for the winter and them revive in the spring. This fall I lost my sister. She laid down one afternoon and Jesus decided that her seasons on this earth were to come to an end. The hope in that, is now she is perfect. She won’t have to endure the hardships that challenged her seasons… the relationships that break her heart… the weakness that overcame her body. She has been made whole. Her vibrant beauty will last for eternity.
I know if you asked her, she would have preferred more time on this earth to live, love, and laugh. In our human minds, her life was cut short.
My sister’s sudden death has taken me to some deep, dark, sad, lonely, and yet sweet places. I’ve mulled over her life… my place in her life… my life…the lives of my family.
While spending time in Seattle, I have twice now seen the absolute beauty of the orb spiders and the intricate webs they spin. Early in the morning they are magnificent!
As much as I hate spiders, these little guys and their webs were hard not to look at! The intricate detail… the consistent patterns. Some were practically perfect and others had flaws, yet they withstood early morning dew and light winds. If one was partially or completely destroyed, they began again to rebuild… I’m imagining even stronger. The resolve of these spiders is worth learning from.
I’ve thought a lot about my life and the life of my sister. I’ve thought about how each day we are “spinning our web” as we go through life. Some days our webs seem more perfect than others. Some days the flaws are hardly noticeable and other days… glaring. Some days our webs are completely wiped out. How we choose to deal with that is entirely up to us.
Do we choose to immediately rebuild and work to make it even stronger? Do we move to a new location where our web might be more protected from the harsh things of the world? Do we rejoice in the imperfections and see the hand of our Creator in them, or do we hide away and compare our webs (ourselves) to those around us? Do we join in with the community of others and work to make ourselves stronger through the interactions with others? Or do we choose to go at it alone?
When I first saw these webs and had an idea to write a blog, the words that popped into my head were, “Oh the tangled web we weave.” As I’ve spent time thinking and praying and contemplating my life… that statement became very real to me.
This past year my web has seemed very tangled and extremely imperfect. It’s been taken out several times and each time I’ve had to rebuild. I wish I could say that it was more perfect and consistent each time I did, but I can’t. Some storms it has been able to withstand the harsh conditions and others it was completely destroyed.
I’ve learned though, that I can NEVER stop rebuilding. I must always spin again and call on the help of others if needed. My web must not be isolated from those around me. Community is important and essential. Thank you, to those of you that have been or are, a part of my community and imperfect, tangled web I call my life!
PS… I have the name of a fabulous web designer! Message me for His name!